I thought that I would never say this but both girls are finally sleeping through the night. It took some tough love and many sleepless nights for me to finally give in and sleep train. Best decision ever. I wish I had done it sooner. Maddie and Emma have always been decent sleepers but as he months kept going on it was getting harder and harder to put them to sleep. Right from the get go I nursed both of them to sleep. Nursing a 3, 4, or 5 month old and putting them done gently so they do not wake up is no problem. Putting a 9 month old down is. So here I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Do I sleep train or continue what I was doing which clearly wasn't working for me.
While we were on vacation the girls slept horrible. Maddie would not sleep in her pack n play and they both screamed going to bed and in the middle of the night. Although we had a great vacation, it was a little rough in the sleeping realm. Fast forward to the week after we got home from vacation, the horrible sleeping continued. 4 nights in a row I slept proppped up on a pillow holding Maddie so we could get some sleep. That's when I decided enough is enough and the next day I would not be doing that again.
So what did I do. Well panic of course and then quickly talk to a few friends about what worked for them as well as read a few articles and a sleep training program. I decided to do a combination of all of them. A few days of hard crying did the trick.
Emma has always been a better sleeper but would sometimes wake up when Maddie would cry. So first step I decided to split the girls up. Maddie is in our guest bedroom in a pack n play and Emma is in her bed. One day we will go back to sharing a room but not until they can sleep on their own without any problems. Second step I did what I normally did and nursed / bottle fed both to sleep. Emma figured out on her own how to cry or play herself to sleep so I fortunately didn't need to ever train her. The sleep training was just for Maddie. On the first night when she woke up I went in and fed her and instead of doing it over and over until eventually I could put her down without her waking up I just put her down and let her cry. She was safe, fed, and had a dry diaper so I knew all she needed was me... which wasn't going to happen. I then went back to bed, turned the monitor off, and set an alarm for 2 hours. Some may call this harsh but I've learned that periodic checks only make her more mad. So I went with the full extinction method. I fell back asleep and when I woke up to my alarm she was out... not crying.
The next night I decided to feed her to sleep but instead of letting her fall asleep as soon as she got drowsy I kept talking to her so she never fell asleep. I then put her in her bed drowsy and she only cried for maybe 20 minutes and then slept the whole night. The next night... same thing. It really only took about 1 hard day of crying for her to figure out the night time sleeping. Nap time I did the same routine but it's taken a bit longer. She's getting it now and is sleeping much better.
So why did I wait so long. Matt had an incredibly busy season and the last thing I wanted to hear all by myself was a week of a screaming baby with no help or support from him. Sometimes I miss nursing Maddie in the middle of the night. The closeness and bond of holding a baby in the nighttime I wil cherish forever but for now I'll take sleeping all night.
